...This is your child on too much Halloween candy. Any questions? (I love it when ballerinas try to get all funky fresh on us. Watch the little dude in the front row on the right. He's got boy band written all over him.)

Whatever it is that you're doing tonight: trick-or-treating, handing out tricks and treats, watching scary movies, going to costume parties, or nothing special except listen to spooky bats outside, have fun tonight!


http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2008/10/29/2008-10-29_cant_decide_on_a_halloween_costume_look_-1.html

After weeks of losing hope, I found Ben and Jerry's Cake Batter ice cream at Safeway today. Maybe it's a sign, seeing that today happens to be Brandy's birthday....HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRANDY!

I saw two middle-aged couples holding hands and drifting along the sidewalks together. Not one, but two. They looked sweet. My parents have such a solid marriage and are a strong couple, but I can't recall one instance where they ever held hands. They're not really into PDA. I don't blame them. Their displays of affection is best left in the shadows for me.

Haven't heard a peep from the elementary school in Alexandria. They were supposed to have an answer Monday of last week. Maybe it's a good thing though...it could mean that I'm a major contender. I called them twice about it, once last week, and again four days ago. They assured me that they would call once they reached a decision.

Petrus's memorial is this Saturday. I'm meeting Jo and her friend Kim to see the Muppets at the Smithsonian.

Jo told me that Petrus Bosman died Saturday night. Probably while I was out seeing "The Dark Knight" for the third time. I took his ballet class for two semesters sophomore year. He called me "Pink Slippers" because I wore shiny velvet bedroom slippers from Wal-Mart instead of real ballet shoes. When I finally got a pair for the spring, he kneeled down in front of me, gripped the soles of my feet with his delicate hands, and exclaimed that I had "such beautiful feet." Too bad I couldn't use those feet with as much grace and agility, but at least I tried, and he was very patient and would cheer when I finally got a routine down.

I remember him being charming and a loveable teacher. I looked forward to his class as an escape from lectures and essays at school. He told me a story how he knew Audrey Hepburn through a friend from his days at a dance academy and had spaghetti and wine with her on a night out with a bunch of friends, and then saw her again at the opening of "Breakfast at Tiffany's" in London and how she recognized him after all those years. He knew and appreciated so many great movies, which was something I deeply connected with. I also knew that he loved Judy Garland, and his favorite film performances were Rex Harrison in "My Fair Lady" and Ron Moody in "Oliver!" He also loved Hollywood pop culture and gossip as much as the performing arts. I remember when one student complained about doing a certain routine on the barre, and, in his bright voice, he said the most vulgar thing I ever heard come out of him: "Well, life's a bitch, then you die!"

He was a wonderful teacher. I wasn't the best dancer, but I had so much admiration for him and thought he was lovely. I'll miss him very much.

Within the last 24 hours, I went to see the my most hotly anticipated movie of the year..."The Dark Knight." Not once, not twice, but THREE times! And it was euphoric.

The first time I saw it, it was in Georgetown on opening day Friday afternoon. A bunch of mellow college kids made up the bulk of the crowd. My first viewing I followed the plot and revelled in the excitement that I had been feeling since I first saw the first trailer in December. The film lived up to everything I felt it would be and more. I also wanted to see Heath's Joker, which was intense, scary, original and special. I am glad that the Joker didn't die at the end, but I'm sad that Heath won't be around to reprise his role again and that his Joker won't continue sparring with Batman in future movies. Batman and the Joker are like peanut butter and jelly: the ultimate adversaries that complete each other.

The second time was with two friends, Jo and Kara at midnight. The second time I watched it I picked up things that I missed the first time around, but I knew the quotes. I held back from giving anything away as best as I could, but it was hard! I also paid attention to the way the movie was made, the direction, editing, and enjoyed the acting more. It was the midnight screening so everyone was so geared up and ready to have fun. They were the most verbal group and had a ton of fun.

The third time was in Virginia with a bunch of college friends, Brandy and Sascha among them. By now I already knew my favorite scenes in the movie and when they were going to show up. But I was still entertained and even caught something that I hadn't noticed before. People can come for a popcorn movie, but they leave having had a breathtaking cinematic experience. It's more than a comic-book movie, it is an artistic masterpiece in many ways besides Heath Ledger's knockout performance. I am even more certain that the movie will be Oscar-worthy, which is a rare/absent occurrence in its history.

It was fun to observe the different bits that people laughed at or expressed awe at in the three times that I went too. I feel like each time I went I was with a different crowd at each theater and their reactions came from similar and different places. Seeing a movie in a theater can really lift the experience of viewing it. Or it can tarnish it if they keep talking or making useless noise. That's when they have to shut up.

I love going to the movies. Especially going to see good movies. And this weekend I did my part in helping Warner Brothers make more money.

Who do you think is the Pippiest of this trio?

What I need to do this weekend:

PREP for interview at secondary school on Monday

Apply for other jobs floating out there

Dry clean outfit for interview

Buy new sneakers


What I want to do this weekend:

Go out and have some fun

Windowshop through Target, Best Buy, Marshalls, Banana Republic, and Kramers Books.



Counting down the hours until I leave this god-awful warehouse FOREVER!!! I don't mean to bite the hand that feeds me though, but I'm crazy excited to get work in D.C. Sick of the commute, tired of the wierd people who work and shop here, annoyed with the skeezeballs who leer and hang out by the bus stops after work. Must return to real civilization.

I learned today on GMA that today is the Happiest Day of the Year. I completely agree, even though I am acting like a pressure-cooker on maximum. I guess it's due to Summer Equinox and the long-lasting sunshine.

Excitedly filing new applications.

The pressure's on for me to get a new job. The bookstore has its own issues, and next week I work two days a week in Dupont Circle. But the warnings I've been getting that this was going to happen has been beneficial for me actually. Because it's a source of motivation to look for work. I've contacted people for references this week, and sent out tons of applications....and today I got an interview at a secondary school in Alexandria! I sent out the app only two days ago, and now I have one lined up. I hope it's the first of many promising things.

It's good to know that my efforts are paying off. In the meantime I start doing part-time in Dupont, but my roommate mentioned a community service activity that she does, which pays very well. Now that my work will be closer in town, I'll have more time and energy on my hands to do it. I'll temp wherever I can....GW, Georgetown, Howard...anywhere that's close.

But I've had a recurring fantasy that I worked part-time for Ben and Jerry's lately.....

My sister went up North today. Going to surprise my rents in coming home early. Jealous that she'll get some beach time in. But being in D.C. is good for me work-wise and play-wise, so I can't complain. I'm going to have a good summer. I feel it in my gut.

One in Four New Yorkers has herpes:

http://blogs.villagevoice.com/runninscared/archives/2008/06/survey_one_in_f.php

Today's Horoscope for Virgo:

Your career, reputation, and most important personal goals receive a boost now, primarily through your own initiative and willingness to assert yourself. You feel a surge of positive energy. Superiors or people in authority will also notice you now and can help you immensely, enabling you to fulfill something you are striving for.


Yes! I talked to my boss about things....I asked him for a recommendation. I also e-mailed three other people for one too. Hopefully they'll follow through. In any event, I am putting matters into my own hands. I've stopped being one-track minded about getting into a school library and being more open to anywhere in the area. Because times are too tough to be picky.

EDIT

My California bosses are giving me shit about a reference. They offered to give me one when they threw me out in the gutter on New Year's. And now when I come to them for help, they are being snooty. I learned a lot from them and even though it didn't work out, I don't want to share a mutual feeling of disappointment about what happened there. But I feel hurt about this and if I knew I was going to receive this response from them, I never would have bothered asking.

Had a nice day with Darian yesterday. Really encouraged to have her go out with me on weekends. It would be great for her to go out even though she has her inhibitions. Hey, I do too, but it's no reason to stay inside every night!

But we went to Ann Taylor Loft. I was really surprised at how well the clothes fit me there. I went to Banana Republic last weekend and the cuts were not right on me, even though I love their stuff. I bought a couple of dresses dirt cheap. It was nice because my other summer dresses are from high school!

I met my sister and brother-in-law today. I have to say, she looks good. She said she has gained 6 pounds, hitting 120 lbs. Meaning she must have been, at 5"3, at 114 lbs. I think that is almost too thin for her height. She'll fill out though. She thinks her boobs are big, but still not as big as mine! So while she's staying with mom and dad for the summer holiday, my bro-in-law has stepped in to say that we'll be hanging out all summer. It'll be an exchange of sorts; he comes to use my pool, and he'll pay for my dinner. I kind of cringe, but hey, a girl's got to eat. But we just don't have much to talk about, and I tried to veer him away from it by telling him how stupid and unstimulating I am, but all he could say was, Nice try, but it's not working!

Reconnected with Meghan from the Mercantile Library in NYC. She lost my voicemail but really wanted to touch base. Also, Michele from San Francisco e-mailed me. She went back to Croatia for some business, even though she's a NoCal native. But I have to tell her that I moved away. I value both of their friendships, so despite the distance I am planning to stay in touch with both of them.

Took care of Father's Day by mailing my dad which he got yesterday. Today's my parents' 33rd anniversary. They are the best example of a marriage I have ever seen. They are strong individuals, yet they are still each other's equal. It's a respectful and loving partnership. Makes me restore my dwindling faith in marriage.

But right now, I just wanna have some fun.

To Do:

Mail Flat Stanley CD to Devon before school's out
Mop my floor
Clear out recyclables
Shop with Darian and give her a tour of the apt.
Help control Jen's leaking A.C. while she's in Atlanta
WORK ON APPLICATIONS!!!!! ARG!


Busy Saturday. Looks like I'll have to squeeze

Spent the night at my sister's on Friday. Unexpected, but still nice. We went out for Mexican and had ice cream at the Dairy Godmother. She looked better and seemed to have an appetite. I won't see her for a while, but it'll be nice for the parents to see her

Waiting (im)patiently for my friend. I think she got caught among the metro holdup on the red line. Yikes. But it gives me time to spruce up my resume.

I was pretty stumped over what to do tonight. After waffling between my sweet side (mop floor, crank out needed applications, buy groceries) and my wild side (I don't know, walk around D.C., maybe see Christian Siriano in Town), my sister ended up making the choice for me. We're going to meet for dinner in Old Town. Her husband is away for the weekend, and she wanted some company. I'll go since she's going to be up in MA for the summer. Mom and Dad will spoil her shamelessly. I think it'll be good for them to get their minds off my grandmother too.

Will spend tomorrow afternoon with Darian shopping. What's on tap for the evening, who knows. If she doesn't want to go tonight, maybe I can encourage a girls' night out besides the two of us.

Went to my physical therapy appointment today. I love my doctor…he’s from Italy, and he really knew his stuff. He sat me down, asked ankle questions, and for the next 90 minutes we did a round of therapy to strengthen the ligament. First I laid down on my side and he rolled and massaged my ankle area. He said I had very flexible ankles, which can be good and bad. Then he put a machine right on the hurt area and left it there for 10 minutes. It was really tingly and my muscles were twitching, but in a good sort of twitching. Then he took me into a room where people were doing gerbil-looking exercises, and I did a ten minute cycle of three exercises…Flexing my feet in a whirlpool, Lying face up and lowering my heels against a raised bar, and then rolling my feet on a lateral ball. The whirpool thing made my ankles crack, the raised bar was kind of hard to do and I had to take little breaks, and the ball was the most painful one to do. But I got some good stretching in too, and!
the doctor gave me a list of stretches to do every day. Overall I am WAY happier with the care I got there. And for all of those treatments, it turned out to be less expensive than the craptastic Urgent Care session I had in May. I have another appointment with him again next week!

I am thinking a lot about my big sister. I just hope her man steps up and takes care of her. I know he bought baby books and all, but I also know that his enthusiasm for it isn’t as high. I am just impressed with my highly underrated secret-keeping skills: All day Saturday she was trying to reach our folks who were driving home from a business trip. She had left a message, looking for yia-yia and pappou (grandma and grandpa in Greek) but their cells were both turned off. Finally at the end of the afternoon, Dad called me, who sounded pretty oblivious. I told him casually to call my sister, because she was looking for them all day. And I hung up. 15 minutes later my mom was screaming “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL US?!” Easy, it wasn’t my place. It would have been wrong if I did. But I threw them off well, I never alluded to anything.

Anyway, I will to do my part to help wherever needed, but I need to develop my life. Honestly since this has been happening I feel like I’m in East of Eden. See the movie with James Dean in it…he’s mesmerizing in it. Except instead of two brothers, it’s two sisters, and I’m Cal, and my sister is Aron. My sister is evolving in all the acceptable and lauded ways, and I am the do-gooder with a rebellious streak. But I need to remind myself that I have to take care of myself before I take care of others. My sister should know, because that’s what she always tells me, and she’s lived by that example too. And I know that she’ll finish teaching next Tuesday and she’ll be with mom and dad for the bulk of summer. We had a talk together anyway, and she knows that I need my time with my friends because I can share with them about personal issues as freely as she and her husband do.

Who knows what will be on tap for the weekend.

It occured to me that gwu hospital has a medical library. And I'm seeing the doctor there tomorrow. Hmmm...do I smell a prime location for future work? I'll mosey over there tomorrow after my appointment and mention I have a library degree.

The pool has longer hours now!!! 10AM to 9PM! That's great because it always closed at 7PM right when I'd come home from work.

My mom ran into April, my old babysitter, in town today. Her two kids were with her, the boy's starting high school next fall, and the girl is in middle school. She was also expecting a third child, her first with her new husband, and is due in November. She took what could have been a tough situation and made the best of it. I'm her #1 fan and I'm glad her life has gone onto a great road.

I managed to work on projects and not get too sucked into Facebook. I talked to Joe Malloy over it! He was so happy to converse with me! I can tell it's going to be fun.

Damn, it's raining. No pool time for me tonight.

Last night I joined Facebook! I don't know why I was so freaked about it. It's social but it still has effective privacy features. Sounds like a good mix to me...I already have a whopping 3 friends! :-D I still need to learn how to use everything and add pix and expand my profile, but I really like it! I'm suppressing the urge to use it at work.

But I am looking for jobs while I'm working, since I know that this is mutally a temporary arrangement.

Doctor's appointment domani. Gotta work out this ankle problem.

Since my boss is looking for me to to secure a better job in the near future, I'm sure he won't mind that I look and apply for some while I work.

Clubbing last week made me rediscover the exciting part of being single and get out of the negative side of it (i.e. loneliness). Having more single more friends around to do stuff with helps significantly too.

I even miss my roommate. She left to Atlanta for the week to see her family. She tells me to take an hour out each day to look for work. My brother-in-law and sister tell me that too, but I respond more to the truth than to verbal abuse. I still manage opportunities to walk around naked in the apartment while she's living there since our work schedules differ. But it's odd to associate the apartment without her in it.

And spending Sunday with my sister to shop and eat dinner with them made me realize that their phase in life is too real and too soon for me. She was eating more Tums than the steaks my brother in law made--which actually tasted good this time--and then hung out on the couch feeling crazy ill. We also went to Banana Republic because I needed shorts (still need some; never got any) and she tried on a dress for fun. Her stomach is still freaky 6-packed. She complained about how sore her boobs were and thought they were so big. I honestly haven't notice a change in size. I can still see her spine and the bones along her chest. My mom and I talked and she's worried about her body since she's always been so thin. We're sisters, but on such different planes. She's married, but it's so domestic and boring to me.

To work now. The harder I work, the better I can nurture my freewheeling lifestyle.

All I really wanna do this summer (besides land a decent job) is swim and party. Those are my priorities.

The moments after my sister and brother-in-law left my apartment were accented with notes of sadness for me. I was pumping myself up for last night at the Rock and Roll Hotel with Jo and Brandy, but the things they were sharing and telling me when they were in my domain, about my life as well as their lives, made me feel like I was in a rut. How my sister at lunch said that she wants to have kids while she's young. Being thirteen months apart, that's around my age. How my brother-in- law told me that I am selfish for having my parents pay for my health insurance when I should start paying for it myself. How I shouldn't have a one-track mindset on applying for jobs. Even though I want to work as a school librarian, they just throw back at me "beggars can't be choosers."

Why do I let it get to me even when the whole foundation of what they have was offered to them by their parents as well? I'm at the foundation stage. Nevertheless, the transience and instability wore down on me.

Things changed for the better when I met up with Jo and Brandy. I hadn't seen Brandy since graduation four years ago, and she had a high school friend of hers and her boyfriend, and we all gelled very nicely. We ate in Adams Morgan at a nautical-themed restaurant. It was really fun, and then we went to the Rock and Roll Hotel. Unfortunately the group we wanted to see was cancelled due to laryngitis, but we went inside anyway. The decor was really nice, and I ended up spotting a cute guy that was making faces at me too. We connected back and forth in places, the dance floor, the bar, and the hallway. I would deliberately run into him and send small signals, but he had an aloofness to him when we were in direct contact. But while he was talking to his friend and looking over at me on the couch with Jo, Brandy's friend's boyfriend kept talking to me. As nice as he was, he was getting in the way of the other guy and me connecting. But Jo was like if he couldn't connect with you, he's not worth it. And he wasn't. So I moved on.

But it was a really fun night, and I needed it. Afterwards we dropped off Brandy's friend and boyfriend near their apartment, and we had a sleepover at Jo's apartment, Sweet Briar Style! We got in at 12pm, and talked until 2 about girls from school. It's amazing how you think that some people are so tight, only to look closer and see the cracks in those friendships. Brandy surprised me that she wasn't on as close terms with some of her friends at college...not unlike the same situation as me. It seems like we all had our own frenemies at SBC.

I slept with Jo on her comfy mattress on the floor. I woke up about 5 hours later and watched Jo sleep with her glasses on. And I started to cry. It had been almost a day since absorbing the news that my sister is having a baby and evolving with her life, whereas my life is on indefinite hold. Despite valuing my individual identity and making the choices right for me, I felt imperfect and incomplete. As happy as I usually am about myself, and I'm even happier just living here, the family pressure got to me. Jo woke up, sensed my trouble, and we had a nice long chat about that. Then she showed me facebook and all the wonderful people on it, and how their lives seemed to have changed. Even Sweet Briar girls move on with their lives beyond the prized ideals of diamond rings and spit-up towels. As long as their marriages are solid, that's one thing, but if it's for competition, that's another. I respect the former, but the latter is just lacking in imagination and personality.

I am finally able to start letting go of allowing the pressure of being single get to me, when I'm coming back to settle into a part of me. I'm not the only 25 year old single woman in this country. And especially not a Sweet Briar one.

I'm getting back on the road of O.K.ness. I have done things in my life, and I've got good travels, solid degrees, and fine friends to show for it.

Thank you Jo and Brandy!

And I'm considering joining facebook now too :-)

I was on my way to Dupont to deposit my check and go out for sushi when my sister called. Figured she was going to nag me about something. She said, "would you like the sound of 'Thea Nikki?'"

Greek word for....err...aunt?

Her egg-o is pregg-o!

I was mildly stunned. But she sounded so chill about it. She and her man knew on Wednesday and told immediate family today. I didn't think they would have any at this point....they arguably didn't plan it, but I noticed pee sticks in their cabinet in April over Passover when I was looking for Tweezers. Kept mum about it, of course. I think she wanted one even though her man isn't really excited about it at the moment.

I was sputtering things like, "When, how, did it happen!" Well, how's obvious...but answering when: The week between Passover and Greek Easter.

My sushi plans were subsequently thwarted, because she wanted to meet for lunch. I was like, sure. We met at the fountain in Dupont Circle, it was the first time I looked at her and realized that there was almost three of us there. I tried to hug her, but once she saw me she started screaming that she wanted shade and that she was hungry. I just sighed and walked on with her.

We had pizza together at Circa and she was like I smell everything! She smelled a garbage truck go by behind her. Her boobs were killing her, and said she gained four pounds. She thinks it's all in her boobs, which she said were super sore. She talked some baby talk and was talking about the due date....February.

Honestly I was walking around for an hour before we saw each other and I had my iPod pump my ears with unsweetened tracks: Metallica (Master of Puppets), Keane (Is It Any Wonder?), Rolling Stones (Gimme Shelter), and oddly, Outkast (Happy Valentines Day), . I was going to listen to Prince since it's his 50th birthday today...let me do that right now....O.K., back. And she is all excited about the growth of pregnancy...I admitted to her my feelings about it, no disrespect on her state, but just my general thoughts on pregnancy--how on one hand having something grow within you must be really powerful, but all the scary and freaky sensations you feel during pregnancy, which other people interpret as being the exact reason why ladies love to be pregnant and how special it is--but even though she said it wasn't planned since her man is still in law school, when she saw the results, she was happy. I challenged the idea that it was a beautiful process, and she retorted by saying that it's a natural one.

Honestly, if you're on birth control and are responsible sexual partners, I can't believe that this could be an accident. Even though I don't know where they'll put the kid when it's born in the house, I feel like they wanted one. But that's my theory and I'll keep it here.

Then we walked back to my place, and in an inpromptu form her man came over and we all went swimming at the pool in my building. She was even wearing a bikini! She wants to be the type to wear bikinis throughout her pregnancy! EWWWWW! I must say though, her stomach was flat. Well, she may for once have bigger boobs than me, but at least my belly will be flatter than hers! :-P But I'm supportive, don't get me wrong.

I'm craving single time. It's really raining house mortgages, bridal showers. And since the last two weeks, babies. My neighbor/longtime childhood friend just had her boy, I found out today from my mom.

But I'm all coupled out at this point. Now I'm primping to do single stuff with some Vixen alumnae tonight! Yay!